Gone, But Not Gone

Are you with the bird floating on the breeze?
Are you the whisper amongst the trees?
Are you the wind rippling through the grass?
Are you the sun shining down at last?

Are you the wild flowers in the woods?
So many what if’s and should’s.
What if you had run the other way?
I should have told you to stay.

Is that you on the windowsill?
Singing from the robin’s bill?
Did I hear you call my name,
With the ivy tapping the window pane?

Oh, my sweet daughter,
I will bring you home.
Away from the crows,
To the warm, golden glow.

I will set you free over the dancing sea,
And I shall try so hard to breath.
And feel your skin in the sand between my toes.
Hear your voice in the ocean blows.

You are gone, but not gone.
Yes, your heart has moved on,
Though not in footsteps walking,
But all around, my darling.

What If?

Day is dawning
And day is daunting
Blind for a second
As the sun beckons
But I do not go
Hand to the window
Eyes are searching
For the birds soaring

So empty in the room
So sorry for the gloom
What if flowers could help this heart?
What if I go back to the start?

Night is drawing
And night is daunting
Trust the stars
To lighten scars
Hard, clasped hands
Wedding bands
Touch me, my man
Tell me who I am.

So empty in the room
So sorry for the gloom
What if flowers could help this heart?
What if I go back to the start?
What if flowers could help this heart?
What if I go back to the start?

Down by the River

Down by the river
I wrote all my tunes
The gin in my liver
It rose me so blue

Up grew my daughter
She soaked up my wounds
Fetched eggs and water
While I slept in the dunes
While I slept in the dunes

I wasn’t there
Now I’ve come to miss you
Never combed your hair
Never came to kiss you

Down by the river
I loved you, I did
Wide eyed mother
Just wanted a kid

Up grew my daughter
With a ghost in her house
Deserved my heart
Not the sound of guitars
Not the sound of guitars

I wasn’t there
Now I’ve come to miss you
Never combed your hair
Never came to kiss you

All that I’ve missed
Down by the river
All that I’ve missed
Down by the river.

New song

I wrote a new demo. It’s a bit weird possibly, but I enjoyed doing it and all that.

I think I will call it Makeup, but I’m not sure yet.

Mingus had no part in this version, but there were others… he likes to box things and be a pain in general but making lots of noise. He’s an attention seeker.

Everyone loves Mingus.

Anyway, see what you think of the song – as with all my songs, what it needs are some strings.

And now I have to find a way to post it…

A new song

This is a new song about a childhood memory of mine… I was petrified of the dark and most nights after turning out the light, I would be convinced I’d see a tall, black figure standing over me. And it would make me lie very still, until I worked up the courage to turn on the lamp and fill the room with light, which is when he would disappear.

Shadow Man

It’s quiet
My back is turned to the night
A dark dreamer wonders into the bedroom
I always hear whispers

Standing over me again
The little stars are looking in
Flick the switch so they glow
Well, the light makes him go

A screamer
Still, I lie in the madness
A tall dreamer with a hat and a cape
His shape was a whisper

Standing over me again
The little stars are looking in
Flick the switch so they glow
Well, the light makes him go

Black is dark and dark is night
And all I’d see before I’d sleep
Was the man that frightened me
And I’d lie in my sweat and tears
For all those years
With the shadow man

What If

Did you love her as much as me?
I can’t stand it if you did
If she hadn’t kept her from you
Would she have done it for you?
You might be waiting to ask her
With a diamond and silver
And I’d never have met you
Who would I love now?
I’d be walking home
Hoping to see you
Driving to work
Hoping to meet you
In the woods
Hoping to greet you
But I never would
And there the three of you are
Dark haired beauties
And I am alone
Or with a madman
Or a man I cannot love
And you will be in my dreams
Under the sky and the stars
Looking up to where you are

Antony, imagination, perseverance

Everglade is perhaps my favourite song in the world. What I love about Antony Hegarty is his pure, fragile emotion – conveyed through his voice, lyrics, music.

One thing I will do at some stage in my life is write with strings accompanying – and play concerts with cellos and violins and oboes, flutes… I want the whole orchestra!

My friend Emma Case has sort of been an overnight success (may I say so) with her photography. It’s quite amazing! She’s brilliant. She decided she wanted to experiment a bit with it and suddenly she’s all booked up for this year and some of next, mostly to do weddings. Check out her blog and see for yourself the clear talent.

Anyway, my point other than her, is that if you feel like you need or want to do something then there’s no reason at all why you can’t do it. The only obstacle will be yourself. I have learnt this.

Every day I commute an hour to work and in the distance are a line of trees. There is not one day where I don’t wish I was going to those trees. And then I sit at my desk imagining all sorts of things, sunshine, adventures, cats – and music – I think about music.

But the last year has been occupied with other things and excuses of why I can’t write a song or finish one, or record, or buy a new instrument, or play live or something or other.

I know that I have what it takes, but do I have what it takes to get to that place? It’s clear to me I have to try and keep on writing. Perseverance is the key, isn’t it? A very successful business man told me that. And it’s the one word I remember yet I don’t follow much. And actually – that one word is the key to lots of things.

Including sleep. If you can’t get to sleep, do not give up – it will come! And I am going to get some now.

Tomorrow is day job but also music practice.

Goodnight, dear world, goodnight.

She Tells Lies